Sexism and Slummy Mummies

As a blogger I tend to read posts on Facebook and Twitter on a daily basis. I'll see people getting annoyed about things and read about other bloggers' lives. It's a lovely way to stay connected. I don't often feel the need to write about what I've read but over the last few days I've seen a couple of stories in particular that made me want to write. The first was about sexism, the second about Slummy Mummies. I'm going to start with the sexism.

About Sexism

Marks and Spencer recently released some school uniform that has a special hem, it is stronger and less likely to drop making "less work for mum". Sexist right? Well, actually I don't think it is. It's a generalisation and you know what, I don't think it's a bad thing. The majority of mums are the ones that do the sewing, let's face it. I do in my house, that's for sure.

The statement wasn't there to insult men I'm sure, we all know there are some wonderful men out there that do the sewing and the taking care of the children. But we also know that they are in the minority. More often than not you'll find that even if the woman of the household has a full-time job she is also the one that does the sewing and the cooking. 

Yet the uproar on Facebook continued. Women were outraged at the sexism. It was SO unfair to those men that a store like Marks and Spencer would say such a thing. Outrageous! I can't help but think it was all a bit ridiculous. Generalisations exist for a reason, in times gone by the woman has done all of the sewing and even now that is still generally the case. The whole thing made me think of a David Mitchell Soapbox I once heard in which he says "Most people in a Jimmy Choo sale are women and most people at a football match are men". 

Even if you are a feminist and can't believe people still say things like "less work for mum" you can't discount the fact that it is still most mums that do those jobs. 

I found it all a bit silly to be honest. And if we're really talking about sexism, haven't men tried to discount women for hundreds of years? That is exactly why they're "women's jobs" and why we are up in arms when it is thought that a woman does these jobs. And now some people are annoyed that it's unfair to the men?! 

I am proud to be a mum, I do those jobs and they are my jobs. I wouldn't tell a man he can't do them, nor would I expect a man to tell me I couldn't do something. Can we say we're all equal and have done with it?

We came equals into this world, and equals shall we go out of it. 

George Mason 

The Slummy Mummies

Again on Facebook there was an article doing the rounds from the Daily Mail. I won't link to it because it's not fair to the women named in the article. The women mentioned were bloggers I have heard of but I don't read their blogs, Hurrah for Gin was one of the blogs mentioned. 

I know the mentioned bloggers to be mums who swear, drink gin, and do their best. They are mums who are honest about motherhood. They don't try to pretend that everything is perfect, posting wonderful Instagram photos with pretty, smiling children. 

The article tried to make out that these women are in a race to prove how terrible a mum they are. That is obviously not the case. They clearly love their children and want the best for them, why else are they working so hard keeping a blog going and connecting with people on social media. 

I don't swear, I don't drink gin (I think bourbon is much better!), but I do do my best. I don't tend to read sweary blogs, not because I'm judging but because I don't particularly like it. It is a personal choice. I understand that some women find it easier to vent by swearing, and that is fine. Everyone is entitled to be themselves. 

And that's the key thing here. We are all different, we all deal with motherhood in different ways. Some swear and drink gin, some don't swear and drink bourbon, and some yell, scream, and cry and don't drink at all. 

We are all MUMS. We are all trying to get through motherhood with our sanity intact. We are all doing our best.

I write my blog to help all stay-at-home mums realise they're not alone. 

To help you see that it is hard, it's tiring, and some days you will want to throttle your children. But also to show that being a mum is the best job in the world. 

Calling another woman a "bad mum" because she chose to give her children fish finger sandwiches for lunch is nonsense. Saying she's terrible for swearing is nonsense. Can we stop the mum-shaming? 

There will be so many times you feel like you've failed. But in the eyes, heart, and mind of your child you are super mom. 

Stephanie Precourt

Us mums should stick together and build each other up, because when the children are grown and we're on our own we want to be strong, able women who can set a good example to our adult children.

Supporting each other, caring, being there. These are great things to teach our children, and I, for one, will be doing just that.

Here's to Sarah Turner, Clemmie Telford, Katie Kirby, and Steph Douglas, because they're real mums just doing the best they can and being honest about it.


  1. Sexism is about being denied opportunities, rights or being seen as less important. That battle is still to fight. Getting worked up because someone says "mums go to ..." or "mums do ..." just seems a bit meh to me given what else is going on. I haven't read the DM article and have no intention of doing so, it's bound to make me cross.

    1. It (the DM article) really would hun. As for the sexism - you are right, there are other things going on in the world. :)

  2. Ah this explains something I read earlier. I'm all for the idea that we should be helping everyone grow and succeed together, whatever title they want to wear. Enabling and inspiring, not pushing other women down. Surely we have more important issues to deal with rather than who wields the needle and thread in the household, or whether someone chooses to drink gin. #PoCoLo

    1. I totally agree Cheryl, for me - whether we're talking about Sexism or Slummy Mummies, it's all about how someone chooses to live their lives. Why on earth do people think they have the right to be annoyed about how someone else lives?! I've never been able to understand it. :)

  3. oh how i hate niche little groups where people try to categorise themselves and others then rush to prove how cool they are also. i do swear quite a bit, but not in my blogs or on SM. As for the M&S advert, some people just need to get over themselves, things like that don't offend me or even merit any attention, it is what it is Popping over from #PoCoLo

    1. Absolutely Suzanne. I've never been one to get involved in the little niche groups either, it's just not for me. :)

  4. in our house I sew and he puts out the bins. It is a fact that we have traditional roles but I will teach my boys to sew iron etc because they should be able to. The daily fail article was poor journalism at best. However it does feel to me like there has been a shift towards proving how crap you are and being sweary for effect in done blogging quarters. I do think there's room for everyone but don't like joining bandwagons. I'll just stick to being me. 😉 #POCOLO

    1. I have to agree with you about the shift Catie, I have noticed that too. Like I said I tend to shy away from the overly sweary blogs, I just don't see the point in swearing to be honest. I am perfectly capable of expressing myself without having to swear. But anyway... I totally agree, stick to being you, and I'll be me, and we'll all be happy. 😉

  5. I'm trying to recall whether there were boys in my GCSE textiles classes now but can't remember and what does it matter. I think there are skills that regardless of gender could really help in life. Sewing and cooking being two great skills to have in particular. As for slummy mummies I too struggle to read posts featuring swear words. I also fit in the '...and some yell, scream, and cry and don't drink at all' bracket. #POCOLO

    1. I agree Helena, those skills are essential. I mean what if the young adult male moves away from home and mum isn't there to sew for him anymore?! No, but really... I think we should all be taught those skills and choose to do those jobs when it needs to be done. Not pass it along because it's not a 'boy's job'. Haha to the bracket you fit into - I fit into that one sometimes too! 😉

  6. Definitely yay to sticking together, and let's face it a fishfinger sandwich is fine cuisine for lunch, it's on the pub menu in the City so the husbands are probably eating it too! :) #PoCoLo


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