How well do you know your children?

As a mum I didn't think I would learn much about my children - naive I know. I thought they would grow up and I would know everything there is to know about my children. I'm their mum, they wouldn't keep secrets from me - would they? But this isn't just about my children keeping secrets, it's about learning that I don't know everything about my children - they can surprise me, and do!

It turns out that your children are not people of their own, with their own thoughts and likes and dislikes. Who knew?!



Football


Both the Hubby and I have never liked football, we don't play, we don't support teams, and we certainly don't watch it. It has never been something that interests us and we figured that would be the same for our children. I mean we never exposed them to it so why on earth would they like it?

Except, like I said, they're their own people. LP has proved that with his love of football. From a young age (I think around 4) he's been interested in football. He loves playing it with his friends, he goes to an after-school club to play with a team, and he is even starting to show signs he might want to watch it on the TV. I have absolutely no idea where this has come from. Not once have we encouraged him to like football - in fact I'm sure we've discouraged him at some point - but he likes it nevertheless. And now I couldn't pull him away from it, even if I wanted to. He surprised us recently by telling us he wants a football kit he can wear when he's playing in the after-school club - this is not something we ever thought we'd have to do!





Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore. 

Ogden Nash





Writing


Okay so when I think about this one it's not so much of a surprise as the football was, but it has surprised me how talented my boys are. I write every day, I spend time at the computer tapping away and both boys know how much I love writing, so it's not a surprise that my eldest, BP, enjoys it too.

BP has a few short stories he's written the past few months and I have to say that his talent shines through. Yes, okay, I am a little biased but I have been blown away by some of his work. He has an expression in his words that has always eluded me and he can conjure images easily using words. Now obviously he is still young and some of the paragraphs need work but I still think he's a talented writer.



Grown up or still a child?


I have to constantly remind myself that LP is still just a boy, or rather LP is reminding me. LP has an "old head on his shoulders" - he often acts older than his years but there are times when he plays and it occurs to me that he is still only 8 years old. He can hold intelligent conversations with us, he discusses economics and complicated maths, but then he will go and play on his bouncer or get out his toy cars and play for 30 minutes or so completely engrossed in a game that he's made up. In fact we were talking the other day about how he still plays with his teddy bears in his bedroom when he can't sleep. He makes up games for them and gets them to play.


A boy of 8, wearing a white Batman t-shirt and blue jeans with white trainers and a baseball cap on his head, is pretending to do tightrope walking along a wooden barrier than lines a pathway. The boy is holding his arms out to his sides to balance himself. The sun is shining down through the shades of overhead trees. There's the trunk of a large tree in the background. Image for "How well do you know your children?"


And the same goes for BP, while he's 13 now he is still very much a child. Yes he has more complicated emotions these days and an outburst from him can mean anything from he wants extra goodies to he's had his heart broken by a girl, but he is still a child. He likes having fun with his brother, he likes playing board games, and sometimes he wants to sit quietly and watch a movie.

It's so easy to get whisked up in them growing up that you don't realise they're still young children at heart. And it's not a bad thing to let them be young children for a while longer.



Two peas in a pod?


My boys are nothing alike. They've had the same upbringing but they couldn't be more different - chalk and cheese as they say. While BP is quiet and likes to sit and do nothing, LP is chatty and likes to stay active - he can't stay in one place for very long. BP can sit and write for hours, he likes his quiet times and the thought of going on a bike ride fills him with dread. When I think about it he's a lot like me. LP on the other hand craves activity and fun, he wants to be doing something all of the time whether that's going for a bike ride with his dad or playing football in the garden on his own. BP likes alone time, and LP wants fun with friends.

Yes, they're brothers - they have the same parents - but that's where the similarities end.





Everyone knows that if you've got a brother, you're going to fight. 

Liam Gallagher




When you have children I don't think you really consider the massive life decision you're making. You are signing up to watch a piece of you (and your partner) grow up, change in ways you never saw coming, and make mistakes. You are going to watch that person become a person in their own right, they'll have their own likes and dislikes and they may not match your own. That's where the real learning comes in too - because when your children like the things you always hated you have to suck it up. You have to get involved.

So yes, parenting is a true learning experience - and it lasts a lifetime!

An image for pinterest, a young boy walks along a short wooden fence, using his arms out by his sides to balance. Over the top of the photo there is a black square with the words "How well do you know your children?" inside it. At the top of the image there's a logo for "Morgan's Milieu" and at the bottom of the page it reads www.morganprince.com


How well do you know your children?
Have they surprised you with their likes/dislikes?


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