Tween issues you'll face as a parent

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BP is a tween, he's 12 years old and this time next year he'll be a teenager (OMG!). Over the past few years the Hubby and I have had to deal with a lot of new issues and I'm sure these things will continue to be issues for a few years yet. As your little one grows you'll have to deal with a whole host of new issues and when they hit that tween stage they become more complicated. Here's a few of the issues you'll have to face when you have a tween.



Sex


While I hate the thought of BP knowing about sex it has happened. The internet is filled with sex videos, there's all kinds of sites filled with "information" about sex, and his peers will be talking about it constantly. The older he gets the more curious he will be, it's inevitable. 

As his mum I have to come to terms with the fact that he is growing up, it is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. It doesn't seem right. All I can do is talk to him and hope that he makes the right choices. 



Rules


BP doesn't like rules, he doesn't like doing chores, he doesn't like homework, and he doesn't like having to obey. He would much rather sit on his bottom (or lay around) in front of the TV. We have had rows over chores, BP stomps through the house because I've asked him to vacuum the lounge, and there has been tears over homework, but these rules teach him. 

Whether it's chores or homework if you have rules stick to them. While your tween will complain and argue they are learning that there are things in life you have to do. It sounds like a harsh lesson but it will do them good in the long run. 



Emotions/hormones


BP is not good at coping with the emotions and hormones that race through his body. He bursts into tears at the drop of a hat, he can be truly happy for no apparent reason, and he snaps at his brother all the time. It can be amusing watching his moods change from sad to happy after a text from a friend but at the same time it makes us realise how fragile he is right now.

An innocent comment can be taken the wrong way and become a huge deal. Arguing becomes a shouting match. And tears flow.

Tweens are fragile, they're trying to deal with peer pressure at the same as these hormones are causing havoc. It's okay to give them a break.



Hygiene


As their bodies begin to change they need to change their hygiene habits. Starting to use deodorant, being reminded to change clothes and shower often, it's all a part of growing up. I have to remind BP every day about his hygiene. 



Secrets


Tweens have secrets. Everything is a secret, from friends to going out. While it may seem like they're keeping things from you you have to realise that it is okay for them to have secrets. Respecting their privacy is important, but at the same time you have to make them aware that you'll be there if they need you. 



Sleep


Their sleep patterns change as they get older. BP's bedtime is 9pm but I know he will often stay awake until at least 11pm either reading or drawing. It is difficult getting him to realise that although he may not feel tired at night he still needs to sleep. Him struggling to get up in a morning has been the cause of a few arguments.

Being strict on bedtimes and trying to ensure they go to sleep at bedtime is all you can do. Whether or not they listen is another matter.



Independence


From arguments about bedtimes to rule-breaking your tween is testing their boundaries. They're trying to break out and be their own person. It is a difficult thing to deal with, you want them to be independent but you also want to protect them from anything that might hurt them.



All you can do is be there for them, and make sure they're obeying the rules when necessary!

Are there any issues you've faced with your tween that I didn't mention?

6 comments:

  1. I may have 9 years before I have to deal with a teen, but this is very useful to read. Thanks.

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    1. Oh believe me that 9 years will fly by! Thanks for stopping by. x

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  2. I have a 13 year old and a 14 year old (both boys) so I can really really to this post and I agree - it is so hard to see them grow up so fast ... but grow up they will and we will both be there for our boys through the highs and lows of teenagerhood. Let's hope the road isn't too rocky and we all come out the other side unscathed.

    PS I am currently NOT watching any Kevin and Perry videos!

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    1. I couldn't agree more Rosie! And I don't blame you for avoiding Kevin and Perry videos - I think I would too! ;)

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  3. I can definitely see my oldest changing, he is coming up for 10, but already the mood and body changes are creeping in there. This is a great read and I am not looking forward to this part. Bring back terrible twos ;) x

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    1. Haha, yes the terrible twos seem a doddle now I can look back on them! I think 10 years old is about when they start to change, it just gets worse from there. Good luck hun. xx

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